Today is Easter, at least in the West. This means many things in my family; chocolate bunnies, eggs, candy and assorted pagan paraphernalia that culture has kept secularly attached to the later Christian celebration. For my extended family, as well as my in-laws, this is a very holy day–it is the resurrection of their savior. I do not want to take this lightly, and in the past it has never been an issue to have dinner together after they return from church. With children, however, things are changing. I want my children to learn how this day has religious significance for people, even though we are not believers, but I am not sure how to approach this with sensitivity for the views of my in-laws while not compromising our own decidedly non-religious celebration of the day.

I suppose 21 months is a bit early  for history and culture lessons beyond how cool chocolate bunnies are, but holidays always bring these thoughts to the forefront. Part of the dilemma is that my husband’s family really wants us to be Catholic. I can respect this; to them it is the true path and they are sad that their son and his family are not on it. They even admitted that they had wanted to find a priest who would baptize the children when we weren’t around. They’ve decided (thankfully) that this was a terrible idea, but they are still looking for loopholes in our instructions to them to insert religious dogma into my children’s minds, and it’s immensely frustrating. It’s a matter of if we haven’t specifically told them not to do/say something, they feel that is a good time to instruct them on Catholicism. It shows a fundamental lack of respect for my husband and I as intelligent adults and parents, but they don’t see it that way. As I said above, I want my children to learn about various faiths as they are able to understand them, and if my children choose one as they get older I’ll support them in it. I’m just tired of feeling on edge on the holidays that are both secular and religious as I try to protect my children from “truth” that isn’t truth to our family. I’m tired of having to force the respect, because it isn’t really respect if it’s forced, is it?